Who’s Turning Up at Your Meetings? (2023)
Introduction
Nearly all of us have either been part of a workplace meeting or chaired one – have you ever left a meeting and wondered what on earth happened? Often meetings can go off planned outcomes and become either very productive or very frustrating. This is more often than not due to a number of factors; personalities, motives, and mindsets, so let’s explore these things a little further.
Extraversion and Introversion
If you’re familiar with Myers Briggs Type Indicator assessments, you will have heard of extraversion and introversion – this is typically described as “how people gain energy.” People with a preference for extraversion gain and maintain their energy levels when they are around other people and stimulating noisy environments. In contrast, people with a preference for introversion gain and maintain their energy levels when they are able to spend time alone or with few people and prefer quieter environments for optimal concentration.
In a meeting environment, people with a preference for extraversion:
Always have something to say and in their eagerness to have their say, they have a tendency to talk over others.
Help provide content to generate discussion.
Are expressive and energetic when interacting, which may be observed as speaking with high volume, and use of non-verbal cues like waving of hands.
If the extraversion is having too much air time in a meeting think about:
Stopping the person and moving the conversation on by thanking them for their contribution and perhaps saying “Let’s hear from someone else” or “we recognise your expertise, insight, and knowledge, let’s hear what others have to say for new ideas to emerge.”
If the agenda item has veered off topic remind the person speaking of the topic at hand and refocus the whole group back to the agenda.
If the topic area is of interest, but inappropriate at the time, consider requesting the area of conversation be added to a ‘parking bay’ and say you will come back to it at the end of the meeting or afterwards.
If this is a recurring theme consider setting an expectation at the start of the meeting, ensuring everyone has equal distribution at the meeting.
Encourage everyone to help monitor and manage personal participation.
In a meeting environment, people with a preference for introversion:
Are often quietly taking in information and formulating their own opinions, however, they may only share them if there is space to do so or if they are invited to speak.
Are good at listening, watching, analysing, and absorbing information, in order to make sense of it in their own time.
Are contained when interacting meaning they may be more softly spoken and less likely to use non-verbal hand gestures.
If the introversion is having a difficult time interacting in the meeting consider:
Encouraging them to speak up and provide the space to do so, by asking them directly for their opinion to encourage interaction.
Get them to express their opinions before inviting others into the conversation.
Ensure they know their contribution is valued and compliment them.
Work to foster an atmosphere where everyone feels equally valued and able to participate
If the meeting is large, break into smaller groups to develop input from all.
2. The Eternal Optimist
This behaviour is centred upon those who always have something positive to say on all subject areas and find it difficult to face up to problems, and difficult situations, make tough decisions, or say no.
These people often also overcommit and say ‘yes’ rather than cause friction. They will tell others in the meeting what they want to hear, rather than what they really want to say.
If you suspect, some of your meeting members fit these criteria:
Use them as any ally – use their positivity to gain support from others.
If they are failing to see issues or challenges, ask them to take a different perspective for a moment.
If you suspect they are over-committing, thank them for volunteering but invite others to take responsibility for the action.
3. Ever The Pessimist
This behaviour is centred on people who see the worst in every situation, they are skilled at deflating a buoyant conversation. They often believe their view is the only view and are always complaining and talking about all the ways something will not work.
If you know you have a pessimist in your meeting:
Make it clear from the outset what the purpose of the meeting is and the emphasis should be on constructive cooperation.
Be mindful not to get drawn into heated discussions and keep to the facts.
If a negative view is expressed, ask others to comment on the potential problems and ask how they can be overcome.
If you think the negativity may be valid, ask them to explain why they feel that way and direct conversation outward to others in the group by asking what they think.
4. The Devils Advocate
This person will often take the opposite view of everyone else in a meeting and provoke others into a debate. They are good at highlighting problems both real and perceived but less likely to offer solutions. They are often viewed as confrontational and troublemakers that are good at pushing others’ buttons.
Ways to mitigate the devil’s advocate are to:
Refocus them to be positive and avoid using an adversarial approach.
Point out there is value in looking at issues from multiple viewpoints and move the discussion on by restating time restraints or previously agreed issues.
Offer them time outside of the meeting to discuss their concerns further.
5. The Mediator
Mediators are good at diffusing conflict and using humour or clarification to avoid confrontation. They will often emphasise the importance of the main purpose of the meeting and aim to find common ground and create harmony.
It is best to keep the mediators within your meeting involved and especially if you detect tensions rising during the meeting – they are your advocates when used wisely.
General Tips for Dealing with Different Behaviours in Meetings
Keep your focus on an agreement – each agenda item should be summarised, decided on or agreed to and moved swiftly on.
Get full participation – remember to invite only the people you need in order to achieve the objectives of the meeting.
When the meeting veers off track – turn to the rest of the group for support.
Call a break – to refocus a group, invite a short break or have an icebreaker activity to hand.